After sixteen months of being a vagrant gypsy hobo, I finally found an apartment that wasn't coated in wall-to-wall carpet and cooking grease. Great! Except that all of my personal effects were scattered around the country and I had to go get them. Since moving companies do not enjoy renting cargo vans one-way, I rented one in Chicago and scheduled two days to drive down to Indianapolis, then to Nashville, then back to Chicago.
The best thing about those two days is that they are over now. It rained a lot, I spent a ton of money on gas, and I got pulled over in Seymour, Indiana for allegedly rolling through an off-ramp stop sign onto a deserted street. Apparently they don't get a lot of action in Seymour since my new bff the state trooper spent the next 45 minutes questioning me, frisking me and going through all my crap in the back of the van (after calling for backup from three more officers) without cleaning up after himself. I have to hand it to him, though, it's not often that I come across someone who not only wholeheartedly embraces a negative stereotype (in this case, that state troopers are power-crazy Jack Bauer-wannabes) but actually raises the bar for government incompetence everywhere. You can all rest easy now, the streets are safe.
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